Jul 29 2011
Dear Makers of P90X Extreme Exercise Regimen

Dear Makers of P90X Extreme Exercise Regimen,

Thank you for your excellent "extreme" product.  I have been trying it for five days now.  You promised "extreme" changes to my body, and you've already delivered in startling ways.  You promised I'd experience "muscle confusion", and, indeed, my muscles are very, very, confused.

I can't move.

Your advertising includes many testimonies:  "I've lost thirty pounds and four inches off my waist," and "I've lost ten pounds of fat, and two inches," etc.

Well, I'm not sure about my weight loss, since I can no longer summon the energy to roll across the floor and onto a scale.  Nor am I sure about losing any inches.  I can't put my pants on.

I have, however, lost a lot:  My ability to perform routine tasks.  My hopes and dreams.

Control over my bladder.

My will to live. 

Thank you, P90X people.  Like you say on the videos, I'm just "pumped" to "bring it" every day and it delights me to no end to see your smiling, toned faces as I flicker in and out of consciousness lying on my living room floor.  Thank you.



Comments (33) -

7/29/2011 12:40:25 PM
Tara United States
LOL, I can feel what you are saying. I did P90X for about 4 weeks, the worst 4 weeks of my life. I was so sore I couldn't do anything after the workout every day, I was miserable. I know that everyone says no pain, no gain, maybe I just don't want it that bad. : ) Thanks for the laugh.
7/29/2011 12:41:43 PM
John United States
Bwahahahaha - LOVED this!  
7/29/2011 1:02:19 PM
Lenard Canada
You should try Insanity, you don't have to use weights and it only takes 60 days to work.  And for the pain i suggest taking some type of overnight recovery formula.  I would def send this letter to P90X though Tong
7/29/2011 1:06:58 PM
Robin United States
"...as I flicker in and out of conciousness..." My coworkers started staring when I laughed out loud.  So. Funny.
7/29/2011 1:22:15 PM
Jennifer United States
That is too funny.  There is such things as over doing it & maybe the intensity level is a little bit strong for a newbie..but I'm sure it could work for someone that would be considered more in shape Smile
7/29/2011 1:29:35 PM
Joy United States
LOL, and then the tags- Excruciating Pain, P90X, Pending Lawsuit- ROFL!!
7/29/2011 2:22:41 PM
Angel United States
Hilarious! Some of the younger guys from the youth group always tell me to start this program with them... I don't think it's gonna happen no w.  
7/29/2011 2:29:06 PM
Hannah United States
My husband and I tried Insanity and it is rightly named. lol We quit after the third day we were both so sore. The "no pain no gain" saying has been proven wrong already with more studies. Most workouts nowadays have tons of warnings and make a point to tell you if you feel hurt in any way to stop immediately and even consult your doc before attempting. I have yet to find a good fit for me exercise-wise, going to try Zumba next since I love dancing. =)

Love the letter, Brant, you crack me up. XD God Bless! <3
7/29/2011 2:45:50 PM
Tara R United States
Tara R
Hil - freaking - lirious!
I own P90X... i was in tears reading this!
7/29/2011 4:34:15 PM
Kristi United States
You are hysterical, that is so funny!
7/29/2011 4:35:05 PM
Kristi United States
Hey, I love my avatar - can I have it, pleeeeez?
8/4/2011 9:29:31 AM
Rob United States

Sounds like you put 110% into it! Make sure you stretch before and after the workout. Dont give up!! Take it down a notch or two brother. My boss and my neighbors both use the P90x system along with proper diets. The results are amazing! Dont give up and remember to eat enough protien to feed the muscles. Chicken is great and so is fish.

May Jesus bless you in everything you do,

8/5/2011 3:09:28 PM
Staten United States
Beautiful. Had a wonderful laugh out of this. However, I may recommend that you take some supplements and have about 4-5 meals a day with plenty of fats, carbs, AND protein. Doing this for about a week will give you the proper energy, without proper eating you will wither away on workout programs like this....
8/10/2011 8:03:40 PM
John A. United States
John A.
Brant, this is the new P90X you are talking about right?  I wasn't sure it was out yet, but I know how rough the original is...so I can't imagine a "tougher" version.
8/11/2011 8:32:46 AM
Chloe United States

Always jumping on the latest bandwagon (if all your friends jump off a cliff....) my mom and I decided  to go EXTREME - as in P90X.  Beings that we are to cheap to actually purchase it, we were excited to find out that my local library carried it and we could check it out.  
   We commited ourselves as we carried the big plastic package under our arm, out the library, ready to go.  
   For those of you who might be interested in this program, all I can say is make sure you have a committed partner and it really helps to have another participant who sits on the couch and makes fun of the video participants, onscreen and off.  Exercising is so much more enjoyable when your out of breathe because your laughing.
   I function well with routine.  That being said, after 2 weeks of P90X, the Xtreme workout, I was looking for a change in routine.  While at the same time, glad I didn't purchase it, because then I really wouldn't have any change.  Have you seen how much this thing costs? $120!
  My mom was absolutly thrilled when I found a similar workout that got 5 star reviews - Supreme90Day.  Beings that it would only be 20% of the cost, I thought, "Why not give it a try?" This is just the change I was looking for in my life!  I am now in day 4 of Supreme90Day and all I can say is: SUPREME ROCKS EXTREME!Isn't that true for everything?.....
-Supreme pizza
- The Supremes
- Supreme Court - highest in the land
   Wait a minute...maybe I'm getting ahead of myself. I do have to give credit to P90X, after all, Mom lost 5 pounds in my three weeks of Xtreme-ing.
  But, putting in an hour a day was so monotonous, so tiring, so not what I wanted to do. SUPREME90DAY appears to be averaging about a 30 minute workout. This I can do. The only downfall is that I only get a 1/2 hour of laugh time from the clown on the couch. Guess she'll get a workout trying to get 60 minutes of laugh time packed into a 30 minute workout. This workout may be more challenging for her than me!  
   We are now on day 22 and it is awesome. I love it, there is only 1 workout I despise, and even that one isn't that bad. To top it all off, the abs workout is only 6 minutes. No Joke!
   Ok, if you made it to the finish of this insanly LONG post, congrats! And keep with the exercising, Brant!!!
8/31/2011 11:34:13 AM
LOL try going outside and chopping firewood with an ax at age 14 you wont be able to move your arms for a week.
8/31/2011 2:15:22 PM
Yuliya United States
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... I loved this! Thanks Brant for using your gift with words and humor to give me a quick "pick me up" today. (:
8/31/2011 5:18:21 PM
Lauren United States
OMG I laughed so freaking hard at this HAHAHA!! Oh man. "My ability to perform routine tasks. My hopes and dreams. Control over my bladder"  omg you've gotta b the next Tim Hawkins LOL. I was laughing HARD Laughing Thanks for the laugh haha and a little tiny bit of cry haha Smile
8/31/2011 7:45:21 PM
yeah he is definatly as funny as tim hawkins
9/2/2011 2:19:47 PM
Lauren United States
I read this again and laughed HARD again lol. <sigh from laughing hard> Smile Whenever I need a good laugh, I know what to do Smile
9/4/2011 5:40:05 PM
idk HOW many times ive read this and laughed every time (LOL) but I read this to my dad and he laughed haha Brant if you ever quit the radio job (please dont even THINK about it. Smile) you need to be a commedian LOL. You r tooo fun... AND funny. No,w wait you r NOT funny....

.... YOUR HILARIOUS! Laughing HA!
9/9/2011 2:27:34 PM
Kristi United States
Well said. I'm a stay at home mom and I had to stop doing p90x in the morning and...ever again because it drained me of my energy. I would drowned my sorrows in a snickers bar and that seemed counter-productive.
10/2/2011 8:29:58 PM
Paul United States
I feel your pain. I tried 1 of those things and I couldn't move for a week.
1/28/2012 6:08:46 PM
hahaha that's about how I feel when I get home from the qym XP
2/25/2012 12:56:08 AM
Banital United States
It was really nice to study your post. I collect some good points here.
3/15/2012 2:23:50 AM
turboking Maldives
Turbo Fire by Beachbody. Turbo Fire is actually led by Chalene Johnson, the entire master motivator then fitness teacher. Because a Wellness discipline, I motivate people setting then obtain and also surpass their fitness and additionally nutritional objectives. Among the many persistent roadblocks I encounter alongside persons typically is loss of need to lift weights as well as deficiency of wide array inside workouts. Persons learn why they require to be able to get healthy and also have to exercise and also really want to obtain those wellness plans. The particular problem is certainly not enough need then motivation. Almost all of us include attempted a wide range of different at house Turbo Fire DVDs, in addition they will certainly don't cut the entire mustard. Perfectly, NO MORE. Loss connected alongside need ends with Turbo Fire. Lack of type stops alongside Turbo Fire. You are able to be inspired by this system.

Chalene Johnson typically is only anyone in order to get buyers motivated and in addition pumped about exercise. The entire DVDs currently have the ideal get-you-pumped upwards musical set that would your own serious plethora of exercise routines. You may kick, punch plus dance the particular correct path that would optimal fitness. You might burn about 9x significantly more calories then fat compared to inside a conventional cardio exercise.
.For more information:http://www.turbo-fire-workout.com/
3/24/2012 12:02:38 AM
newfturbo2 Maldives
I’m sure you have heard the old saying, “You get what you pay for”?  Well, that saying holds true when buying P90X workout DVD as well.  I have received countless emails from people who thought they were saving money only to find out that they had purchased a fake or pirated copy of P90X.  The popularity of P90X is what attracts these these people who make pirated copies of P90X and to the consumer who doesn’t know any better, they are the ones who ultimately end up losing.  I have heard stories of packages not be shipped at all, not containing all of the workouts, guides were missing, video quality was horrible and many more.  Don’t let this be you.  If you find a copy of P90X for $59 you can rest assured that it is most likely a fake.  With the exception of being able to find a used one, a “REAL” P90X will not be that cheap.  Also, when you purchase a real copy of P90X from this site you get a 30 day money back guarantee.  No questions asked.  If for any reason you want to send it back then you can.
P90X is not sold in stores so you won’t find it there.  Where should you buy it?  You can buy P90X right here from this site and you can guarantee that it is an official copy since I am a Team Beachbody coach.  It is also sold on Amazon for $20 more and I have seen it on QVC a couple times but for the most part you either purchase Beachbody products like P90X from a Beachbody coach or from the infomercial.  So don’t go buying it from anywhere else or you could get scammed.  Why pay $59 bucks and then find out you have to buy a real copy for $119 because it was missing items. If you really want to save a few bucks give me a ring and we can talk about becoming a Beachbody coach, then you can get P90X for $89 and save 25% off of all your Beachbody purchases.
For more information:http://www.p90x2workoutonsale.com/
3/29/2012 2:23:10 AM
bosfire3 Maldives
Turbo Jam Workout show you how To Get In Shape For The Army Best Workout Schedule To Get RippedNeed to knowhow to get in shape for the army? Having thebest workout schedule to get ripped and learning how to increase metabolism naturally are really important aspects in order for you to see those quick results to keep you going. For more information:http://www.turbo-fire-workout.com/
3/29/2012 11:38:47 PM
turbo113 Maldives
CustomizeP90X2 to meet your needs. P90X2 has become a phenomenon but what most people don’t know is that you can also customize P90X2 to meet your specific goals and there are also three different P90X2 plans for different results.  For more information:http://www.p90x2workoutonsale.com/
4/7/2012 9:00:47 PM
commercial fitness equipment United States
commercial fitness equipment
Thanks for taking the time to share this, I feel strongly about it and love learning more on this topic.
6/16/2012 6:54:58 AM
Brenzig United States
1) sounds like poor diet and poor supplementaion.  (multi vitamin + fat supplementation)

2) Sounds like bad sleep patterns

3) sounds like you are too retarded to know when too much is enough

4) you probably downloaded it and skip the end cool down and stretch.  

5) stop whining  - Arnold
11/7/2012 9:41:56 AM
Social Marketing United States
Social Marketing
Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I want to read more things about it! I’ve read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or tips.
11/29/2012 11:09:18 PM
Shawna Hazlett United States
Shawna Hazlett
I once did something called Insanity, which is P90X condensed in to 60 days, so it's more intense. I did one day of it.

And then I didn't exercise again for two years.
Comments are closed